Devastated is an Understatement

Oct 20, 2011

I lost my best friend yesterday. My mom passed away. I was with her the entire time. I saw it all and it is forever burned into my brain. Although I wouldn't give up those last few moments with her for the world, I wish I hadn't  witnessed her death. It kills me. I don't know how I will ever feel better.

To keep this weightloss related, I don't feel like eating. I feel sick constantly. I've lost 5 pounds in the last few days. I'm almost under 200 and I honestly don't care right now. None of it means anything to me right now. I'd rather be 300+ pounds and still have my mom with me......

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