Almost 5 months post surgery

Jan 04, 2013

Well things are good.  If you asked me 4 months ago I would have said "REGRET" for sure.  The first month or two out was the hardest.  Entering the solid food stage posed very difficult for me.  Everything I tried to eat would get stuck and I would have to spend hours spitting and vomiting in order to feel relief from the pain it caused.  Starting a brand new, demanding job (the job of my dreams) at a month out didn't help either.  Here I was on the first day of school, vomiting in the staff bathroom.  Talk about stressful.  So I did what I knew was the answer to success... went back on pureed foods for another month and pray.  I would introduce solids every weekend, in the comfort of my own home and I took really small bites and chewed till I couldn't chew anymore.  This all seemed to work for me and even though I was starting to get sick of eating hummus and tuna on crackers day in and day out, I knew it was necessary.  And in the end it was all worth it.  Here I am now almost 5 months out of surgery and doing pretty good.  I got on the scale today and it read 242 lbs which puts me at 92 lbs lost.  How amazing is that!!!    I have the energy now to exercise every morning before work.  I even asked for the Zumba Wii game for Christmas...crazy!  The best part is I'm just overall starting to feel good about myself.  There are still days that I struggle and eating is more of a chore than an enjoyment now, and I miss eating a bowl of cereal without it going soggy, and I would die to take a big bite into a sandwich, swallow and not have it get stuck, but in the end it's okay.  I just had to change my frame of mind and I tell myself now "it is what it is."  It's done and now I just have to embrace it, so that's what I do.  I still have a little taste of chocolate as a treat here and there and a handful of chips (which I know is old bad habits) but I know when to stop and in order to keep my sanity, it's not going to hurt.  I am only human after all.  So for those of you in the regret stage, just keep your chin up... it does get better! 

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