A new stumbling block in my weight-loss journey...

May 07, 2011

I just got home from seeing my therapist this a little while ago.  As any of you who've made that visit can relate to I'm now sitting here reflecting on things we talked about, etc....  I've been seeing her for a couple of months now and it feels like we're finally getting into the deep, through-provoking, details and not just the casual questions and answers that I assume they use to get to know you and get a baseline.  We started talking about how some of my problems we're working, along with past history, really are starting to indicate the presence of ADHD.  I kind of chuckled at first because the only key word that rang out to me was the hyperactivity part.  If you know me, you'd know I'm not the stereotypical hyperactive person.  So I asked more...  It was interesting to know that the first thing that was stressed to me was that not everyone presents with the typical hyperactivity trait.  Even more so, the hyperactivity can be in the mind and not necessarily in the physical actions.  I was not really sure what to say as I hadn’t gone to see her thinking I’d get any kind of diagnosis or anything like that, but just had been going because I wanted some help working through some things in my life.  Things related to my weight and personal motivations, etc…

The drive home was uneventful, but unbelievably long for the 15 minutes it takes.  My mind really started questioning just what all of this was about.  The only thing I was identifying with when I heard ADD was that the phrase “attention deficit” fits sooooo well.  But, what exactly did that mean?  Like so many of us do these days the first thing I did when I got home was sit at the computer and start looking up ADD and ADHD on the good ol’ goggle machine.  I found tons and tons of information, though most of it related to ADD and ADHD in children.  But some of the pages I came across where very detailed in all of the different traits with someone who has ADD or ADHD.  As expected with anything where you are somewhat self-diagnosing while reading, I was able to pick out many of those traits that really fit me to a T.  But again, it left me really pondering what does it all mean?

I started looking into some books to download and found one that did an amazing job at taking those traits, and using stories from ADD and ADHD patients to explain why they can be such enormous problems for someone who has gone through life without being treated for their ADD or ADHD.  It felt good, it felt comfortable to be able to identify with something and be able to see certain things adding up to numbers that were making sense.  But it left me thinking about what it means going forward… it seems like something that very little understand what exactly it means or does to the mind.  I am afraid people will hear it and think it’s just an excuse for laziness or lack of focus and not see all of the things that are there.  It’s something I really want to talk to others about, yet it’s not something that I want to be dropped as a subject if I bring it up.  My closest friend right now is also going through some major life changes and is really hperfocused on herself right now so I know she couldn’t handle being able to discuss it.  So what about the rest of you, who’s out there that shares this with me?  Who’s out there that would like to genuinely discuss it and what you do to help your daily life? 

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