Joeyzgirl
5 Months Post Op!
Jan 26, 2010
I'm 5 months out and I am feeling pretty good. I bought new jeans, mens 54 and they are already getting big, which I am not sad about at all. I have so far lost 127 lbs. since surgery and 150 since I started my journey. What a difference it makes. I was a little dissapointed that I only lost two lbs. this week, but truthfully I made myself realize that at least I didn't gain.I am comtemplating a 5 day pouch test, just to get control back and remember, and its easy to forget, that food does not control me. I am in control.
I have my good days and bad days. It seems that with food I am obsessed with one thing, say egg drop soup, and i eat that until I completely burn myself out on it, then I move on. For a long time it was frozen mango pieces, thawed, and sprinkled with Truvia. But now I have them occassionally but not every evening. Head hunger is rearing its ugly head and if I don't head it off I will have very bad days. Like the day I decided to try some apple pucker mixed with orange pineapple juice and ate almost a whole bowl of little smokies covered in brown sugar. That was a horrible day for me and may have contributed to my loss of only two lbs. On the whole though I came out of that experience ready to face my real life again and get back on track. I didn't let it get me down too much and I am happy with that progress.
It seems like I am changing and some things I am happy about but others i am not. I stand up for myself more at home and sometimes at work. Things at work have been very hard lately. Coworkers causing problems for others and a supervisor I don't feel I can trust. But in other times of my life, i say HEY wait a second, don't I get to decide? Changes I don't like in myself is this new selfishness. While I know that I deserve time to myself as well, sometimes I am bad about pushing my daughter aside to get that time and I never wanted to be that way. Joe, my bf, is pretty selfish though. When he gets home from work he gets on the computer and stays there pretty much all evening. I do bedtime stuff for Brook and take care of the dog and cat, although he will get his own supper ready. Just once I would like for him to give Brook a bath so i can have just a minute to myself. I will leave that though because it is one area where I do need to speak up.
I think that's all i have for now. I am just waiting for my one on one meeting with the library chief, my boss's boss, so I can tell him my feelings about what's been going on here. I'm nervous and I want to eat so I did, a SF jello. Yay me!
1 Comment
About Me
Crocker, MO
Location
36.3
BMI
Surgery
08/14/2009
Surgery Date
Oct 22, 2008
Member Since
