newmerightnow
Hi, my name is Crissie and here is my story. It seems like I have always had a problem with food in one way or the other. Starting as a baby, I was very chubby. The child hood years were full of cupcakes and Girl Scout cookies and teen age years were full of every diet imaginable to man, along with every diet pills on the market. Then later I found a new way to cope with my eating; I just wouldn’t. This worked for me for many years because I could eat whatever I wanted one day, and then I would starve myself the rest of the week. I managed to keep my weight between 130 -150 lbs. When, I starting having children the weight never seem to go away after each pregnancy. There were always 20 or so pounds wanting to hang on for dear life. I don’t ever remember one time in my whole life that I ever had a flat stomach. Even when I was a teenage, I always felt like my belly stuck out. When I was in my early thirties, I had a hysterectomy. After that, I could no longer starve myself because with a combination of age and surgery my body just didn’t work that way anymore. It was always a battle because my body wanted to hold on to every little bit of that fat there was. My weight has gone up and down throughout the years, and I think I am the only person in the world that can gain ten pounds in one day, and lose it the next. My body seems to love water and will hold on to it as tight as possible. Not only has my weight affected my body it has done quite a number on my emotions too. I just recently found out that I am a compulsive overeater. I never quite knew what was wrong with me; I just knew my life revolved around food. What we were having for dinner that night to what are we going to fix at the B.B.Q next week, and even what are we going to fix for Christmas that is months away. Thoughts of food seem to cross my mind several times a day for no apparent reason. Now that I think about it, I think I have always been compulsive. I am compulsive when I shop, when I clean my house, or even when I have to study something. My compulsions just seem to move from one thing to another. I am doing my 12 month (it stinks) pre-op so I can have the gastric surgery. I have already completed several months and my year will be up in September. About the same time as my 41st birthday, I don’t think I could ever ask for a better present than this. Since, I was diagnosed with sleep apnea and a fatty liver all within this last past year this will cuts down some of the procedures I am expected to do. I hope to have the rest completed by the end of May, that way I only have to just check in with the doctor over the next couple of months. I read the stories posted on here and I am filled with hope, something I seem to have lost many years ago. I know this is going to be a long battle, and I am ready. I know, I can only use this as a tool and it’s really up to me if I succeed or if I fail. I want to do this the right way, so I will continue going to my OA meetings even after surgery, and I will work will a therapist to help me overcome some of my issues. This is a promise I make to myself , because I know even though I might be inside working, my little monster is still sitting out in the parking lot waiting for me to fail. I want the surgery so I can become the person I use to be. I want to become a better mother, a better wife, a better daughter, a better friend, and someone that can learn to love herself again. I look forward to taking this journey along with others that have battled some of the same problems as me.
About Me
Before & After
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