Heptobiliary Scan= E.coli+birthing conjoined triplets

May 13, 2011

So I just went in for a heptobiliary scan. Supposed to be an hour or two of imaging of my gall bladder and no big deal. Until they push the stuff through that makes the gall bladder go to work and do it's thing.  "Chuck" (nice radiology techie guy) tells me at the beginning that they would give me the contrast stuff through an I.V. I'm all "okay no biggie. Been there, done that, never bothered me before." Then he tells me that they will then push a medicine through my I.V. that will make my gallbladder do its job and that I might "feel some changes" when that happens. Okay I am thinking I can deal with "changes" and as I lay on the table watching my liver blink in and out getting brighter and brighter I concentrate on feeling my body and making sure I am all relaxed. I'm all into my meditation and telling myself how each muscle is relaxed and I am feeling peaceful and all is well... blah blah blah. My gall bladder comes into focus and looks like a bright little moon in a starless sky. "It's kind of pretty," I am thinking. Chuck comes back after a while and says that they are going to start the medicine and that it should be about half an hour and I will be all done. "Cool beans cuz I'm dying for a cup of coffee hahah," I joke. He starts the push and goes out of the room leaving me and a girl I cant see off to my right alone in the room. I'm still lying there thinking about how maybe I should have had them give me an extra blanket because my toes are a little chilly when suddenly out of nowhere a huge wave of nausea hits. I ask out loud if I am supposed to feel like I am going to throw up while trying to remind myself that I am laying on my back and puking at this point would not be a good thing because I am going to end up with it in my hair. (yeah I know the things we think of in moments like these right?) The girl comes over to talk to me about what I am feeling when all of a sudden a pain I can only describe as giving birth to conjoined triplets while suffering from E.coli rolls through my stomach. I started crying. I admit it. I cried like a baby. It just wouldn't stop. And I cant roll over and curl up in a ball because for one thing there is a gigantic machine hovering 2 inches over my stomach and for the other I am trying to make sure they can still get the damn pictures they need. So Chuck stops the push and goes to talk to the radiologist who says they will not be able to give me definitive answers because we have to stop the scan because I am in pain. Chuck tells me this and then says the ball is in my court. I have finally gotten to where I can breathe through the pain by this point. "Shit!" I tell him, "Just do it Chuck. I will live and deal with it." So here we go for round two. More of the gut twisting, mind-blowing pain while trying not to throw up because quite frankly there is nothing in there to throw up. I am trying to breathe. I am trying to not claw my own guts out. And again I am bawling like a baby and probably making poor Chuck feel like a real jerk for putting me through this. I hope like hell they got what they needed to figure out what is causing the pain in my stomach because I am NEVER doing that again. I will live on ibuprofen and excedrin for the rest of my life rather than go through that again.
Oh and apparently my reaction DOES NOT happen to everyone. So if you are reading this and you have to have a heptobiliary scarn please don't take my reaction to it as normal. At this point in my life I am finding out that I do not do ANYTHING normal. But more about that later.  My life is somewhat surreal sometimes.

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