7 years post op

Oct 21, 2009

My surgery is now over 7 years ago. Hard to believe. In the past year I have had no complications related to surgery. My labs still perfect. (better than most non- surgical people according to the Dr. ) I am following the same diet - more or less. My weight remains fairly stable with 5 pound fluctuations up & down depending on the time of the month.

 Funny thing is -  I don't do what the weight loss surgery diva experts tell me I am supposed to do. I haven't used protein shakes since my inital liquid diet - except for a few during illness or recovery from plastic surgery several years ago - because I found they put weight on me.  I never did the super low carb "Atkins" style diet.  I don't buy "sugar free" substitutes for real foods. (ie all the sugar alcohol sweetened candies, cookies, cakes etc) The dietician I saw numerous times before and after surgery emphasized a  balanced and moderate approach with all the food groups represented, including whole grain breads, etc. using portion control. I eat pretty much everything and if I want a dessert at home I make things that are healthier for the most part, but if I am dying for my favorite chocolate chip coconut almond cookies I bake them, save a couple for me and give away the rest. that tends to be 3-4 times a year, instead of my preop weekly cookie baking. and keeping all of them and finishing them. I bake my favorite couple of kinds of Christmas cookies but After Christmas all the leftover Christmas cookies go in the garbage can. I have no shame about the waste. When I go out to eat I order what I want - get a box for what I don't eat and occasionally even get a dessert.

The healthy "naturally" thin people I know don't diet. They seem to eat moderate portions, mostly healthy foods, and they don't deny themselves. Many of them rarely if ever weigh themselves, if the pants get a little tight they cut back on the sweets or chips a little.

My diet still features lean meat, fish and chicken as well as some vegetarian dishes - ie veggie burgers, (at least 6 oz a day, divided over more than 1 meal) 3-4 dairy servings, several veggies, a couple fruits and 3-4 whole grain servings. I still eat 5-6 small meals a day. I still do some sort of physical activity daily. I have learned that physical activity can and should be FUN.

Over the years I have had ups and downs, some struggles, and definately some fears that I would "fail" and sometimes warnings that I would fail if I didn't do certain things like drink protein shakes or if I did ever let sugar pass my lips.

the worst time was about 3 years post op, I had gained back a small amount of weight and freaked out. I decided to see a therapist, to sort out my issues with food, and why I over eat or make poor choices. This was truely one of the best decisions I could have made. Losing weight can break us out of our "comfort zone." 

The more I learn about surgery, post op, weight gains post op, the psychological dynamics of what happens to us,  and our relationships, the reactions of others to us and us to ourselves. I am amazed so many make it through unscathed. The rate of cross addictions, divorces, regains speak to the immense pressure placed on WLS people.

What I have learned is ... I am not so diferent fom other normal weight people as I had thought or maybe been told I am.  I have learned that normal weight people also occasionally eat for emotional reasons. That food is  a part of every culture in celebration, mourning, fellowship, and just maybe that is OK too. Maybe that making it so forbidden, or calling it bad and giving ourselves guilt and shame is where much of the problem may lie. That I need not define my self by an eating disorder, that I have to learn to love my self regardless of the size or shape of my body. (still learning to like my thighs , but that is another story :) 

 I still have a lot of years ahead of me to live, so I can't say how it will all turn out in the end, but, so far - so good.

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