I feel like I'm not perfect enough for the Sleeve.

I love your list :)

I bet you know more than you think you do after a life of watching your diet. Like any topic, as it becomes part of your life, you will be amazed at how much more you know in another 6 mos.

I went into surgery not expecting to be perfect, or deprived, or looking to change who I was/what I like to eat. My goal was to use the tool to help me eat 2 pieces of pizza instead of 2 pizzas. In the back of my head, I knew that when I did get over the diet hump (actually start one and have it last more than 24 hours) I enjoyed all the good that came with losing weight. One of my favorite pieces of advice I've heard here on OH, was use the WLS as a tool to recalibrate yourself. By not being able to eat fast food for a couple months and needing to pack your lunch - keep that habit. That first cookie a few months out might taste good, but it will probably be way to sweet and give your tummy a less satisfying feeling than before. If you think you want to sit down and eat 20 cookies (like I have done), pay more attention to the mental health side and talk with your nut or a counselor. I knew I didn't want to live/eat that way and with the help of this "reset" button, I never would.

In my opinion the process includes a lot of self reflection about why you are overweight, what and why you eat, etc... Everyone has a slightly reason for getting to this point and a slightly different post op experience - some can eat anything, some have a picky sleeve, some lose their hunger, some are still hungry, etc... Overall it's a strong tool and you will find a way to use it and lose weight (forces you to lose weight) but the challenge (I'm trying to prepare for) is 1 yr or 5 years out when it's more about using the new habits you have learned to adopt and not going back to old habits. That will be my test, if I'm satisfied with my slice of pizza at 5 years or 10 years post op. Currently, I have zero desire for pizza since surgery, who knows, maybe I'll be lucky and crave a chicken breast 5 years out instead of pizza after my 'second chance'. Either way, in my case, I won't be able to eat the same quantities I used to and that was my reason for surgery. 

Normally I read everything (original post and comments) before I respond to the original post but I wanted to tell you about my, unfiltered because of what other's have written.

First, the fact that you are 3 months out and doing this research already shows me that you are on track!!! I did a lot of processing before the surgery but every night I come onto OH, going between reading posts and reading books on food addiction and changing eating habits.  It is a minute by minute thing for me when the sun goes down and I am in my apartment alone.  I do this and I also work out to pass the time.

I could not do this without these tools and without myfitnesspal app that tracks all of my food.  I am an expert on failed dieting attempts.  I would read all of the books, learn the science behind them (I love the science part) and then tried to institute them.  This surgery though makes all of that unnecessary, at least in my opinion.  I try to eat healthy according to what was given by my doctor and other doctors online. 

I do not have insurance and I cannot afford a nutritionist that specializes in bariatrics.  I am a counseling student finishing my master's in December so I use the resources at my university like free psychological counseling and the databases to verify the things I hear or read about regarding bariatric surgery.  Like most people with disordered thinking about food, I am an all or nothing person.  I am trying not to look at this like a diet but a second chance at living life a healthy way...  with A BIG PART OF THIS FACTOR MY GETTING PSYCHOLOGICAL COUNSELING TO DEAL WITH THE ISSUES at the base of my weight. 

I was ready to change my life.  I have been ready to change my life before..  but this time is different and I will work my butt off to make certain it is different.  Sometimes I feel like I am fooling myself but I trying to work through this self-doubt by calling a friend, reading something inspiring (like stories here on OH), I call my friend who had surgery in Mexico at the same time  She is not doing well at all with her surgery (we are 6 weeks out) and she is continuing to eat sugar and not get her protein or take her vitamins...  she also isn't exercising.  I see her struggle and learn from it.

I work to keep very clear on my goal.  I want to be healthy.  I want to feel sexy.  I am working on the confidence that I have let erode over the last decade.  Honestly, one night I literally sat down to paint a picture of my life how I wanted it to look.  It was very different than the reality of my surroundings.  I love the colors and textures of what could be and I work to achieve that, starting with just being sweet and happy.

Examine your life, goals and limitations with honesty, ingenuity and integrity.   The VSG can't change the outlook but it can be the drastic measure that is needed (the tool) in order for YOU TO CHANGE YOUR OUTLOOK.  I wish you luck with everything and I am here if you need support.

Juniper 

I loved your post, Juniper. All best,

Sherry

Hi TanyaR,

None of us is perfect, and you have to remember that we've all been obese.  We've all struggled with many failed diets before surgery.  The surgery changes things.  It doesn't make it automatic or easy to lose weight.  But it does make it possible.  It really changes the drive to overeat so that the head hunger and physical hunger are more manageable. 

I'm diligent in my food choices now, but you have to keep in mind that I am the same person who failed every diet before surgery and ended up weighing 385 pounds!  I couldn't have succeeded without the weight loss surgery.  I suspect the same will be true for you.   Obesity is a disease and WLS is a treatment that works.  I suspect you will be delighted with the results as so many of us are.

best wishes,

Carol

Amazing weight loss, and amazing advice what an inspiration :).

Hi Tanya. I have been thinking about some type of WLS for about 10 years. I went to a support group with a friend of mine about 10 years ago and then decided that I wouldn't be successful because my mind wasn't in the right place regarding food. Back in December, I came to the conclusion that approaching 50 years old, I HAD to make some type of change in my life: I am on high blood pressure meds, cholesterol meds and would more than likely be on the road to diabetes. So I decided to stop eating non-healthy carbohydrates. I stopped eating breads, pastas, rices, and potatoes. I dropped 20 pounds between December 9 and January 9. My first surgeon/NUT/RN appointment was on December 9, and that initial weight loss motivated me to continue making small changes every day. Next week I have my last appointment before they submit my paperwork for approval by the insurance company and then I will get my surgery date.

EVERY day is a challenge (heck, every hour is a challenge). You don't have to take any drastic steps like I did with the carbs, you can start out with a small change. Small changes sometimes snowball into great overall changes to your health. I am not perfect by any means, I slip up on MANY days, but everybody slips up. The up side to slipping up is to remember that we all do it, we all will ALWAYS do it, but the key is to push ahead and get back on track. I see a therapist next week too, and I am hoping that by unloading some past baggage that I am carrying, and by talking about my obsession with food, that I will remain motivated to stay on track.

I am rambling on, but this forum inspires and motivates me throughout the day. I check it in the morning, during my lunch/breaks, and I am on here reading posts throughout the evening. There are LOADS of informational, motivational and inspirational posts by people who are either thinking about surgery, in the process of getting it, or have had it. Don't think that you will fail during your weight loss journey, just know that we all slip up, it's normal, we're human. But keep focused on the bigger picture, your future and obtaining overall good health and a longer life. These are things that motivate me.

Thank you for your response! I also keep on checking this forum its actually refreshing to view other peoples weight loss progress. I hope your approval comes fast and that you get to a healthy weight good luck keep in touch :).

Thank you for sharing your concerns.  They show great insight!

Prior to surgery I "knew" what was the right way to eat - I think we've all dieted enough to know this.  But my insatiable hunger and huge capacity made it virtually impossible to lose weight, much less keep it off.  The  sleeve has given me the opportunity to take the information I knew to be true and make it work for me.  

You are taking the time now to learn how life will change for you and that also puts you ahead of the game.  

I encourage you to also read posts from people who have experienced some or a lot of regain.  It will keep you mindful that we aren't perfect and slipping can and does happen.  Those people have the courage to come here, amoungst a lot of seemingly perfect sleevers, and admit that they've strayed from their plan and their bodies are paying the price.  Don't discount those posts.  They happen as often as posts from people who seem perfect or from those of us who are WAY too early in the journey to have been truly challenged.

That's my final thought.  Look and think about surgery dates as you read what is said.  I'm only 6 months out.  The sleeve has made it possible for me to rock a lifestyle change for 6 months but I have no illusions that this is how my life will always look.  I've read enough from seasoned vets to know that the challenge grows the further out I get.  So yeah - I have been 100% on plan - but that's maybe not the most realistic "forever" projection.  It's just where I happen to be in the process.  I'm not perfect, AT ALL, but the sleeve as let me make on plan choices thus far.  

Keep reading.  Keep posting.  And best wishes as you make this happen!!!

Hi, Tanya! I'm so glad that you posted this topic. You aren't alone by any means. I'm sorry that you have been made to feel that you cannot do this. There are a lot of posters here who claim that there is one "true and correct way," while others hawk magic recipes, while still others will claim that if you did not have a specific surgeon or a specific bougie size, then Sorry, pal. You're doomed and might as well go dive into a bowl of ice cream and give up... This kind of fear-mongering is completely useless, but, unfortunately, it isn't going anywhere any time soon.

Here's my two cents on the issue... You have to find what works for YOU. I encourage you to keep reading here often, but take everything that you read from veterans with a grain of salt. What looks like "success" to one person might translate to dangerously low calories and scary blood sugar drops to another person... For example, I'm almost 6' tall, and if I tried to follow the program of someone who is, say, 5' tall, I'd faint on a daily basis!

For me, success looks like awareness. I eat carbs, but I am mindful and aware of how my body reacts so that I can avoid carb cravings... I haven't been an exercise freak since surgery, but I am aware of the fact that I'm not going to get to my adjusted goal (whatever that ends up being) without moving my booty... I don't know and don't care what size bougie my surgeon used on me, and I am aware of the fact that my sleeve is a TOOL that I have to use to the best of my ability, regardless of how it stacks up to anyone else's.

You don't have to be perfect in order for the sleeve to work for you. You just have to take things a day at a time and be aware... No denial, no excuses, and no giving up.

Best of luck, dear. Feel free to add me as a friend and PM me any time. I'm happy to be as supportive as possible and help you stay accountable :)