Emerging emotion...weird

So, every year I make treats for my husband's crews at work.  This year is no different...or so I thought.  I had surgery on 9/17/12 and have been doing good...slow, but good.  So I set off making these things yesterday and thought "I have this under control", until today.  One of the treats is cookies...in my former life I LOVED cookies.  Now, I do dump but it takes a bit ...not just a bite or two.  So yesterday I ate a Hershey peppermint kiss and a peppermint kiss pretzel over the course of the evening.  I also test tasted the butterfinger candy (a small pinch) just to see if it tasted right.  Today, I make these damn cookies and I had a half of one (they're HUGE) and a piece of candy corn!  Then the flood gates open and all of a sudden I'm scared and crying.  I'm a wreck.  I thought I could handle this....I SHOULD be able to handle this.  I've worked so hard, I don't want to fall into my old habits.  I feel like it's my problem so why should everyone else have to pay....like not making treats.  But on the other hand, I'm like screw it....if I can't do it then I won't do it.  I just didn't know I COULDN"T do it until I'm already doing it lol.  So now I've got to finish this and it may be my last year.  Ugh, how crazy am I?

Ugh, how crazy am I?

 

Pretty frickin' crazy!  As we all are!  This surgery and process brings up some major issues.  We can't fix them overnight, and the surgery sure didn't fix our heads.  That is why some people (like myself) are in counseling to help up deal with the issues that might come up after surgery.  Listen, the fact that you are cognizant of these feelings is step number one.  Step 2 is now you know that they can be normal feelings.  Step 3 is up to you as far as what you do with that information. 

I feel your pain! LOL

I love baking for Christmas, but I've had to cut back since having my daughter. I'll probably make something for Christmas Eve but I'm not going crazy like in years past. It's too tempting to me to have them in the house, so they'll be the last thing I make on Christmas Eve. I'll also be making something that is appropriate for me to eat, so I don't fall into a Peanut Butter Kiss cookie coma in the corner. LOL

This can actually be a positive. How? Well, now you know that you have some worries you didn't know you had. Now that they are out in the open, you can deal and cope with them. Secondly, you know that there are some foods you have a hard time resisting.

The biggest thing, I think, is your fear that half a cookie and a piece of candy corn are going to derail you. Being aware is how we stay on top of this. So you are aware. Now it's time to plan a strategy. You don't have to completely give these foods up forever, and a small amount once a year while you bake isn't going to cause you to go back to being MO. 

I still make cookies, but I make ones I don't like. That's just one coping strategy. There are lots of them. You could include some treats in your goodie package that you can have. You could completely stop making these treats. You could chew some strong peppermint gum while you bake (sounds weird, but it makes everything taste off, which discourages sampling). You could designate someone else as the taste tester.

So chin up. You have seen how this could be a big problem, and you can come up with solutions that work for you.

take care

Just wanted to say how much I appreciate the advice in your post.  They're great ideas for those of us who are just starting to find our way.  Hopefully, I'll be able to remember this as I need it!

Beth

Shannon,

You're only 3 months out from surgery, and are still learning!  Don't be too hard on yourself.  Now you know that cookies and sweets are a trigger for you, and that's important information.  So consider it a lesson learned.

It's very nice of you to make all those treats for your husband's work, but things change.  If it's something that causes you distress, then either don't do it or do like the above poster suggested and make only stuff you don't like (that's what I do at Halloween - only buy candy I don't like).  And maybe by not making all those goodies you'll be helping others stay healthier, huh?

Dry your eyes, sweetie, you are doing very well in recognizing this is a problem situation and stopping yourself before you ate a whole plate of cookies (like I probably would, lol).

Kathy

Thank you all so much.  Just when I think I've got it all under control, BAM...the universe has other ideas lol.  I had my little freak out and now can move on.  I just have to adjust and I think that's what this is all about. 

Dear Diamond:   I've been making holiday treats for years....until THIS YEAR.   My surgery was November 16, 2012 and I came home from the hospital on Thanksgiving Day.  Needless to say it was a weird Thanksgiving for me and my husband who loves all the traditional dinner etc;   Watching him eat Turkey drumsticks with the trimmings he could make and me eating broth, suddenly brought everything into perspective.  Life goes on... it is US who have chosen to make a change in our life for better health, better mobility and fewer medicines..... now we laugh about that day because it was the first time my husband cooked dinner and to boot a Thanksgiving dinner.  I was so weak I couldn't do anything bu****ch.

It made me think ahead to the Christmas holidays and the fact each year I make about  16 dozen cookies for friends, family and our local firemen.   I knew I couldn't do it because I would be tasting and sampling everything....I've already had a run in with a brownie and learned 1 cookie/brown is not enough and 25 would do me in.   So I called or e-mailed family and friends and told them this year I would not be delivering cookies, perhaps next year would be possible.  Then for my family I called the bakery and had them wrap 7 dozen mini cookies which my husband keeps away from me.   Now my family and visitors are able to have a treat when they come over and I stay out of trouble.    Believe me no one *****ads these posts believe for one minute that any one of us can bake cookies, cakes, pies etc; isn't going to sample them.... So....PLAN AHEAD make different choices - START NEW TRADITIONS.    Have your husband  pick up something from the bakery instead..   PUT YOU FIRST.