59 lbs to my first goal!!!!! **** lbs!!)long sorry...
I got on the scale this morning because I missed weighing on Sunday.(my usual weigh day.) An HALLELUJAH !, I am 59 pounds from my first goal! I turn 43 on December 29th and I want to weigh in at 300 pounds for my birthday. It is my present to me :).!!
At first I truly thought I was just doing this to save my life. so my kids would have there mom.(esp my 9 yr old) An so my hubby would have his wife for a Little longer.
But now... it's ME, coming BACK TO LIFE :).
I have not been this happy with my self as a person,EVER.
Through therapy,life changes,and a drastically changed mental attitude. towards life in general,an esp my own life,what motivates me,what makes me happy. I have FINLAY found the PEACE I have been looking for most of if not all of my life.
I'm not saying the surgery did all this. It gave me the last tool I needed to actually see my dreams come true. For me the mental work has been much harder than the physical. My battle with my self and my depression has been rough.
But being able to see actually results from all my hard work. Being able to go for a walk with my kids for me is a miracle.
I went for my first walk with my 9 year old 2 weeks ago. He is 9 an he and I had NEVER walked any where. EVER. When I realized that, it mad me cry for the old me who was barley existing,much less living.
sorry this is sooo long folks. i started it just intending to share my wonderful discovery and share. But some how I just poured my heart out there, literally let it all hang out. and if ya'll knew me you would know I never used to do that.but of late it's ok.because I am ok and it's ok to just be me.......
p.s. thanks for listening.
At first I truly thought I was just doing this to save my life. so my kids would have there mom.(esp my 9 yr old) An so my hubby would have his wife for a Little longer.
But now... it's ME, coming BACK TO LIFE :).
I have not been this happy with my self as a person,EVER.
Through therapy,life changes,and a drastically changed mental attitude. towards life in general,an esp my own life,what motivates me,what makes me happy. I have FINLAY found the PEACE I have been looking for most of if not all of my life.
I'm not saying the surgery did all this. It gave me the last tool I needed to actually see my dreams come true. For me the mental work has been much harder than the physical. My battle with my self and my depression has been rough.
But being able to see actually results from all my hard work. Being able to go for a walk with my kids for me is a miracle.
I went for my first walk with my 9 year old 2 weeks ago. He is 9 an he and I had NEVER walked any where. EVER. When I realized that, it mad me cry for the old me who was barley existing,much less living.
sorry this is sooo long folks. i started it just intending to share my wonderful discovery and share. But some how I just poured my heart out there, literally let it all hang out. and if ya'll knew me you would know I never used to do that.but of late it's ok.because I am ok and it's ok to just be me.......
p.s. thanks for listening.
May We All be Blessed and Valued
marty
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