watching people stuff themselves at a chinese buffet

"What was more disturbing was the mounded plates I saw people eating - I used to be that way - I just cant even imagine eating that much now."

This topic brings me sad memories.  Memories of people watching me as I walked to the buffet from the table.  Memories of wondering what people were thinking watching a big person at a buffet.  Memories of wondering what the staff was thinking.  Memories of wondering if managemen****ched to see how much food I was eating.  Memories of trying to decide if it was worse for people to see me walking back to my table with a big plate of food "only" once or twice, or if it would be worse for them to see me walk back and forth multiple times with small plates of food.  Memories of feeling guilty for enjoying a buffet.  Memories of wondering if people were judging me for being there.  Memories of wondering if people were talking about the big person eating at the buffet.  Memories of wondering if people talked about it afterwards with their friends and family.

People wouldn't really count how many times I went for food, would they?  People wouldn't really be judging how much I have on my plate, would they?  "Of course not", I would tell myself, "people have better things to do with their lives then pay attention to what I, a total stranger, am eating."  I told myself I was being ridiculous and paranoid for having these feelings.  I guess I was wrong.

Thank you for posting that.  It was really insightful.  I know I've felt that way before and I hope people here who are farther along in their journey can put themselves back in those shoes long enough to realize how much they're hurting someone else.  

I don't know if anyone has mentioned it, but I've seen a lot of skinny people stuff their faces at buffets, too. Ironic how face stuffing seems to go largely unnoticed unless there's a large person involved. Screw double standards.

You are SO right. My BFF is a bean-pole, and can eat about twice as much as I EVER could---probably five or six times as much as I can eat now. No one ever gives him a second glance. When he and I go to the Chinese buffet, there'll be 5-6 plates piled up on his side of the table, and a half-eaten plate on my side. (Even seven years post-op, my eyes are still bigger than my belly, LOL!)

Yeah the numbers of rail-thin people who can just pack it away like there's no tomorrow is quite astounding. I must admit, I am envious of their metabolisms! Why wasn't I born with one of those! Ah well, I have faith that the DS will help remedy the problem :)

Yup. And the OP was NOT being judgmental, doncha see? People who know him KNOW he wasn't being that way. Uh huh. I've watched him do this kind of post and run many times over a few years. He doesn't come back and face the music or give any indication of understanding how he comes across.

That kind of thing ****** me off.

The double standard ****** me off a lot, too. One time I was up to see my surgeon in Scranton and I stopped to eat at a favorite diner. Ordered my favorite soup and meal, was all but rubbing my hands together with glee at the yumminess. People around me noticed and grinned and giggled a little. I noticed that and was a bit shocked as I thought about how very different their reactions would have been if I had shown such transparent pleasure in my food when I weighed 400 pounds.

Yeah I know what you mean. I have a lot of respect for people who come back to their threads and politely clarify their POV if they've accidentally come across too strong or suspiciously vague. Tough-love where it is deserved is a very different situation, but there's a lot of the snooty (snotty?) hit-and-run types in the mix... Fie on it, fie.

Good meals are meant to be celebrated without fear of reprisal by onlookers

But if you're overweight, you just can't win. No matter how little you consume in front of others, if you're overweight everyone just assumes you're an overeater. Or, onlookers will ****pick about every detail if you have something healthy in front of you - like your choice of dressing; nevermind the fact that you're eating a nice salad with artichoke hearts, someone is going to make a snide comment under their breath that you picked italian dressing over the low-fat lemon poppyseed dressing.

Don't get me started on the crap in low fat and fat free products. BLECH.

HA - best post I've read today. congratulations and here's your otter!

because you otter be proud! 

I did!  I ate massive amounts in public when I was anorexic, and nothing at all in private.  As an obese woman, I nibbled tiny amounts in public and ate huge quantities at home.  Both equally pathologic