Question:
Has anyone experienced loss of libido after surgery? Maybe not right away, but still
I'm 39 years old (he's 41) and I've been married 19 years and our sex life has been normal. A obese woman and and a average man. I had my surgery 28 months ago and for the last 18 months, I have had NO LIBIDO. I still love my husband very much, but do not have any desire to have sex with him. I do not even fantisize about other men. I need to know it anyone has expereniced this problem and what did you do for it. I've thought about horman levels being off but don't know if that's possible after surgery or not. Please help with any advise you may have. Email me soon. Please use "after surgery" as your subject so I will be sure to read it. — Kathie S. (posted on February 25, 2002)
February 25, 2002
It may be that your hormone levels are out of whack. You might want to
have your PCP or your OB/GYN check them out. Don't be embarrassed to talk
with them about what's going on. This is not a new subject to them. One
other possibility is anti-depressants. If you started one shortly before
you noticed your lack of libido, that might also be the cause. Again if
that's the case, talk to your doctor. There are many anti-depressants on
the market. I've taken about 4 of them and 3 of them have caused sexual
side effects and the other one didn't. It's a matter of trial and error.
— garw
February 25, 2002
Our hormones become funny things after surgery.. I know people from both
end of the scale.. My libido has went through the roof! One of my
girlfriends can't even stand for her husband to get close to her... My
doctor told me he wanted me to get a little further post op (only 3 months
now) before he does anything for me there. So ask the PCP, or Gyn...
they're there to do this kinda stuff.. Good luck
— Elizabeth D.
February 25, 2002
You might have low testosterone levels.
— [Anonymous]
February 25, 2002
I am only one month post-op and I feel the same way...sex is the last thing
on my mind...I find myself pulling away from my husband, he is
frustrated...I mean I love him to death I just dont want him touching me..I
hope that it gets better..
— tylerswife
February 26, 2002
Thanks for asking this question, same with me and I got some helpful info
from all of you.
— [Anonymous]
February 26, 2002
You could be going through menopause. I know a few people who went through
an early menopause after WLS. Or it might just be your time to go through
it. You should see your gyn or doc and get hormone tests.
— Carol E.
February 26, 2002
I can relate to this question as I have experienced the same thing. I never
cared that much about sex, but after my surgery I am not at all interested.
Needless to say this has caused some problems in our relationship (married
24+ years!). I went to my gyn and he gave me a shot of testosterone. It
helped a little, but not very much. I'm not willing to take it on a regular
basis though because of the side effects. I wish they made Viagra for
women!
— georgiacarol
February 26, 2002
You could have been writing about me!! I am 37 and my husband is 40. Our
sex life has never been great, but at least we had one! Right now (I am 13
months post op), I have absolutely no interest in sex. Even simple kisses
and caresses are not for me right now. I just don't want to be touched!
I've never said that to him, but I guess he gets the picture. We've not had
sex for quite a while, and I do feel bad. Sometimes I wonder if it is just
a lack of energy. One other thought, maybe it's depression? I am not
currently on antidepressants but wonder if I should be. I am also
irritable, moody, and just plain miserable. I've gotten behind on my daily
"chores" and it seems like I can't get motivated. I took
antidepressants several years ago and did not like the side effects. I
suppose I had always reasoned that once I lost all of my weight then I
would be the happiest person in the world. Well, I was for a while, but the
last 2 months have been awful. So, I am sorry that I don't have an answer
for you, but I wanted to thank you for asking this question and to let you
know that you are not alone. Shelley
— Shelley.
February 27, 2002
I'm 46, been married for 23 years and always had a great sex life. I just
about lost my libido after surgery too. It turned out to be hormonal. I
have had a hysterectomy, so I was on hormone replacements. But, after
surgery, I found I was not absorbing it orally so I was switched to the
patch. After a year on the patch, I wasn't absorbing that either. I've
been giving myself shots monthly for 3 or 4 months and this month, I am ALL
OVER my husband - day and night. He loves it and so do I. Plus, I have
the energy now! Go see your gynocologist. Losing weight greatly affects
our hormones.
— Cindy H.
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