Question:
I know I am losing, but my pea brain still thinks I am a fatty.

Do any of you feel like this? I am 4 months out and down 71 lbs. I get compliments ALL the time from friends and co-workers. But in my brain and in my eyes I am still as big as ever. When will we feel better about us? I sometimes think I will wake up one day and find out I never lost this weight. Any of you have the same feelings?? Thanks :)    — Gina D. (posted on September 7, 2002)

September 7, 2002
Can't speak for anyone else, but sometimes I think I'll always be fat to me, despite being down almost 160 pounds. In any case, I wouldn't lose any sleep over it: even if your head forgets you're losing weight, your body knows what's really going on, not to mention your checking account, having to buy all those new clothes. ;-) Hang in there.
   — Chuck O.

September 7, 2002
I am a a little over 6 months post-op and I feel the same way, I have lost 114 pounds and 70.5 inches, and I am into size 10s now, down from tight 26/28s, but I still feel like people are looking at me cause I am fat!!! some days I feel skinny and other days just the other way around,, hopefully that will change...
   — bikerchic

September 7, 2002
I am 19 months post-op. I have lost about 180lbs in that time. I went from a size 28-30 to size 4-6. I still cannot see how small I have become. It's called body dismorphia and some people have this problem for a while. I believe some day I will see the true me, but we lose the weight so fast that it takes a while for our brain to catch up with our actual new size. Those of us that have always had a weight problem and have never seen ourselves small take longer than some. Some people never have this problem. Be patient and enjoy the new healthy you that you are becoming. You are only 4 months out and have a lot more experiences waiting for you. It's an incredible journey, take time to enjoy it and best wishes and luck to you along your way.
   — Janie C.

September 7, 2002
I know how you feel..I am 5 1/2 months post open Rny and have lost 96lbs. I went from a size 26/28 to a size L or 14/16....I went from 265lbs...to 169lbs..I look in the mirror and still see fat...I can't see where its coming off because to me I am still fat. I can't seem to get my brain to relize that I only have 44lbs to go to my goal...I look and see about 150lbs more of fat on me...So, I am in the same boat you are. Wish I could help you with changing this..but please know your not alone...and if anyone could help with this....please do..because as for me..I feel that I might go from being over weight to being to thin..due to my brain thinking another way...
   — Debbie S.

September 7, 2002
Last week I was looking at some pictures taken the middle of August and saw a lady wearing "my outfit"... yep that lady was me, and truly I did NOT recognize myself!! Don't share that with many people cause it seems kind of weird, but I really do not see what others see yet. No wonder my girls scold me for wearing my clothes too big...I read often of others saying the same thing, and that it does take some time for our brains to "catch up" (post op 9/18/01 down 104lbs)
   — Denise W.

September 8, 2002
IT'S SO FUNNY HOW "US", THE W.L.S. PEOPLE WILL READ THINGS HERE THAT HAVE JUST HAPPENED TO US. IN A FEW HOURS MY WIFE OF 30 YEARS AND I ARE GOING TO CANCUN. AFTER LOSING 235 POUNDS I WAS SHOPPING FOR CLOTHES FOR THIS TRIP.. I WALK INTO THE STORE, GO RIGHT TO THE "BIG AND TALL" (MEANING OBESE) MENS RACK, I FIND MYSELF AT 190 POUNDS HOLDING UP SHIRTS WITH MORE X'S ON THEM THAN A PORN MOVIE, 3X 4X, THEN I STOP AND THINK, "YOU IDIOT, YOU WEAR A SIZE "LARGE" NOW"!! THEY SAY THERE IS ALWAYS A THIN MAN OR WOMAN INSIDE A LARGE BODY,, WELL I FEEL THERE MAY ALWAYS BE AN OBESE THINKING BRAIN INSIDE THIS NOW THIN BODY!! I'LL CHANGE WITH TIME, BUT 30 YEARS OF BATTLING FAT WILL TAKE TIME TO ADJUST TO, BUT IT BEATS THE ALTERNATIVE,,"HAVING TO" BUY BIG CLOTHES..GOOD LUCK
   — bruce M.

September 8, 2002
I think I have posted about this before, so sorry if it's a repeat story. I was at a bar with a friend who is overweight and I was complaining that I never get "hit on" We were the only girls in the bar and I said the guys look around and all they see are "two fat chicks." My friend said "no, they see one fat chick and one normal looking chick." I still don't believe I look normal. I feel like I am huge. I have gone from not fitting into the scrubs at work, to wearing extra large scrubs...I look at the other people wearing x-l scrubs (they are color coded on the neck) and those people look WAY skinner than I feel. I too wonder when my brain will catch up. =)
   — Nichole B.

September 8, 2002
Hi, I posted this question and I thank all of you who responded here and who e mailed me. It helped to know that this is something that MANY of us are dealing with. Wow, can you imagine how we will feel when we finally DO see ourselves the right way?? God Bless you all, this is my only support group I have an I cherish every one of you. Thanks :)
   — Gina D.

September 8, 2002
I have this feeling EVERY day. I am starting to get better. When I look in the mirror (when I start at my feet and move up), I DO see a thinner person. It's just when I see MY face on that body, I start "looking" fatter.
   — Patty H.

September 12, 2002
I am dealing with this same problem. I cant seem to see what everyone else sees. The other day my 19 year old niece and her friend were making comments about how thin my legs are and one of them said she wish she had legs like that! WOW!!! I was shocked, I never thought I'd see the day someone would say they wanted something I have, especially when it comes to my body size! I was also looking at a friend of mine that I consider to be a normal size, imagine my shock when I found out Im actually smaller than she is! I was looking in the mirror and seeing the "fat" me and I think part of it is the hanging skin on my stomach. I am thinking that maybe after that is removed I will see the thin me. Who knows?? Another thing that crossed my mind is that almost everyone in my family is obese and I worry that if Im thin, they will not accept me. I keep waiting and looking for the thin me, I am confident some day I'll find her, in the meantime, im liking the person I see no matter what!! I hope you do too!
   — Carla H.

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