Question:
Can Someone Please Help Me With My Body Image?
Is there anyone out there who is approx. 5'4-5'6 and who weighs around 190-205 lbs? I would really appreciate seeing some pictures if you could share them. I am 5'5 and weigh about 199 lbs. right now amd about a size 14-16. I am having a really difficult time seeing myself right. I asked my husband if I was approx. the size of a lady who walked by and he looked at me like I was crazy. He told me I was half her size. I don't believe him. No matter how much I lose, I still feel HUGE and like people are still staring at me. Some days are better than others, but I am really confused. I see people on the before/after pictures here who have my current weight posted, but I figure they MUST be like a foot taller since they look so great! I am not trying to compare myself, just trying to get some visual image as to how I appear to people. Thanks so much! **God Bless** — Shawnie S. (posted on January 5, 2003)
January 5, 2003
Shawnie - I just checked out your latest picture on your site and you are
looking great! I can see a huge difference between your 5-month picture
and the previous pictures... Body image is a big issue with us post-ops.
We tend to retain that picture in our mind and that is what our brain sees
when we look in the mirror. Just keep in mind the tangible signs of your
weight loss - the inches you have lost, the weight you have lost and the
size of clothes that you are fitting into now.
<p>
Your hubby is obviously happy with the weight loss. I really don't think
that he'd deceive you by saying that you are smaller than you really are.
<p>
I had my surgery six days before you, so I've been following you off and on
as I see you post in the Q&A. I started out a lot heavier than you (I
was 427 when I started) and I am down 126 pounds as of my last official
weigh-in 12/14. I see my surgeon for my 6-month checkup next week and will
get a new official weight.
<p>
I know that I have lost a lot of weight and inches. A suit that was tight
on me pre-op had to have major alterations (in fact, it was almost too
major to be done) in order for me to wear it at 3 1/2 months post-ops.
And it's getting too big for me again. I used to wear 6x clothes - now I
am getting into 2x clothes. I went down to Florida on a Walt Disney World
vacation over Christmas and could do tons more walking than I did when I
visited there in 1998. I also didn't need a "seat belt extender"
on the plane flights. I know that I am down at least 10 pounds since my
weigh-in 3+ weeks ago and am probably about 75 pounds from my goal of 214
(which would be 50% loss of my original weight) at 6 months out.
<p>
Even with all of that, there are times I see myself as fat as I was. Hang
in there, Shawnie. Let others see the weight loss in you, even if you
can't and keep up the great work! JR
— John Rushton
January 5, 2003
Shawnee...I can totally understand the problems you are having. I started
out (October 1991) at 300 lbs the morning I left for the hospital, a size
26-28. Today, I'm a size 12 and heading towards a 10. It's only been 15
months. I still gravitate to the plus-size area of stores, and still think
of myself as a large lady. Every now and then, I'll catch an unexpected
glimpse of myself (in a window or mirror) and wonder who that person is.
It takes time. It will get better. It's almost like waking up in someone
else's skin - you have to learn how to recognize yourself all over again.
Hang in there and enjoy the surprises. Wait until you run into a family
member someplace unexpected and they don't recognize you. What a hoot.
Have fun,
— linmazz
January 5, 2003
Hi there! I saw your before an after photo's and you look awesome!! I had
my surgery on June 26,2002. I'm 5'5 started out at 263lbs. and now weigh a
180 lbs. It's still hard for me to not to see myself thinner. I get
complements from everyone that knew me at my previous size on how great I
look and you name it. I still look in the mirror and see the fat person
and call everyone crazy, right now I'm just fitting into a size 12 but they
to me looked like my old size 24W! I have my old jeans to compare to now
and I didn't realize how big I was 6 months ago. I know this is starting a
viscous cycle for me because I'm over training myself at the gym and
causing muscle injury, also I'm too cautious on what I eat. I'm seeing a
counselor on this issue and I would love to keep you posted on suggestions
he recommends. I'll e-mail to you before pictures and photo's taken in
November 2002 . I was wearing a 16 then. I hope this helps and e-mail me
anytime!!
— Adele S.
January 5, 2003
I feel your pain, girl! I asked my husband the other day about how I looked
(he tells everyone I look great but sometimes I think he's just trying to
get lucky when we get home later). I told him that sometimes I can't see
any real difference, I still feel fat. He told me I'm just too
self-conscious about the excess skin, especially around the abdomen. He's
right, I know he's right. But when you check yourself out naked in the
mirror it sure is tough to think positive thoughts! I took my 6 month
post-op measurements today and I've lost mega-inches all over and I'm
wearing a size 14 jeans, down from a size 24. What will it take to convince
me? I'm hoping a tummy tuck and some catcalls from some cute construction
men this summer! Keep thinking those positive thoughts! - Anna LAP RNY
7/3/02 -101lbs.
— Anna L.
January 5, 2003
p.s. Shawnie you do look awesome, by the way! And I'm hoping no one blasts
me for saying that about catcalls from construction men... I'm not really
looking for strange men to define my success...just for some smiles :)
— Anna L.
January 5, 2003
I am crying just from reading what you said. I am going through the same
thing. I had surgery 11/21/02 weighing in at 304 pounds. Now I have
reached 257 and feel great but do not see, when I look in the mirror, that
I have lost weight. My boyfriend says I am crazy and so does my family.
We are beautiful and just don't see it. We are so used to looking at our
ugly selves that reality has not checked in yet. Don't worry! I am sure
you are beautiful!!
— Regina C.
January 5, 2003
Hi Shawnee..I too have been having this problem. I am 5'5 and am 176. I
still feel like I am 346lbs...all the time. The previous poster was right,
I tend to focus on all the excess skin instead of the collar bones and
shoulder bones that are popping out all the time. It is very hard to see
progress in yourself. If you like, you can look at my profile...the last
pic in my profile, I was wearing size 14...I am now in a 10-12 (depending
on the cut) I wish you the best of luck...this is the hardest thing I have
encountered since my surgery...harder then missing food and harder then the
physical aspect. My thoughts are with you and YOU LOOK GREAT!
— Marcie B.
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