Question:
I was just wondering if anyone out there is as SCARED as I am?
All my life, everything has been a struggle for me. Right now, I am very very HAPPY with life.(Read the intro in my page) I have been soooo into this surgery for the past year. My best friend and I did everything together, she had her surgery in Dec. I was denied in Dec. and I was going nuts. I appealed in Jan. Got approved in Feb. Having Surgery in Mar. And now I am SCARED! Because of the way my life has been I always tend to go into things expecting the worst yet hoping for the best. I keep thinking to my self that if for any reason all else fails I've got age on my side. But I'm still sooo scared. I am going to write a "will" this week because I do have a son. I am feeling all these good then bad things. I have a lot to live for. I have lots of exciting things happening in my life soon, too! I will be taking engagement pictures in April. I am getting married on May 30th and my sons "10th" birthday is on Mar. 23rd. Im going to go nuts here... lol! Do you guys think I am being to extreme? Has anyone felt all of this, too? — Dayanara A. (posted on February 25, 2003)
February 25, 2003
It's really normal to feel like this. I also have kids, 4, from 18 down to
5. I was scared to death, but was also scared not to have the surgery.I am
so glad I went through with it, I now enjoy things with my kids I could not
enjoy before. Think about the positive things to help you get through the
scared stage. Hope this helps.
— Valerie M.
February 25, 2003
Scared, who isn't. What's scary is wakeing up one day and your 40 and
you've wasted a lifetime on diets that will never work and your kids are
growing up with a parent that can't enjoy the simple things with them
because the weight you are carrying get's you out of breath getting out of
the chair let alone playing with them. I wish this was available to me 20
years ago. Being afraid is normal, wondering "what if", can haunt
you for a lifetime. If you have done your homework and researched the pro's
and con's of this surgery, trust that your surgeon knows what he is doing
and fully understand the changes you need to make, FOR EVER, talked to your
loved one's, prayed, and you still feel that in your heart this is the
right journey for you, then be anxious for nothing. You probably already
know the risks involved, but go with your heart. I am 8 months post op and
down 90 pounds from surgery and 140 pounds from this time last year. I have
never regreted my decision.
— Gary C.
February 25, 2003
I don't even have a surgery date and I waiver between extremely excited and
HOLLY &*%$!! I too have two children who are 4 and 8 and no close
family that would be able to take care of them if something happens to me.
I don't know what the answer is...I can only tell you that I feel ya!
Best wishes. mk
— Michelle K.
February 25, 2003
Oh yes, I was really scared! I had never been in the hospital before, no
surgery, no kids, no broken bones, etc. I had NO idea what to expect. If I
can do it, you can! Now I'm going thru that fear again because I have my
plastic surgery coming up on March 31st. Its natural to be scared. Wouldn't
be normal if you werent!! Your going to do just fine. Like Gary, I also
have the 'regrets' of not doing it along time ago. How many years did I
waste sitting and watching the world go by because of my weight? Not
anymore!!!
— Kris T.
February 25, 2003
Scared!!! I was convinced that I was going to be the 1% that did not make
it out of surgery. When I went into surgery my husband said he loved me
and I just started crying. The next thing I remember is being in the
recovery room. I am only 2 weeks post op but it has been a great two
weeks. I am so glad that I did it. The minute I walked out of the
hospital I was off of all of my medications for various medical problems.
It feels so great not to worry about taking pills every day to stay alive.
Look to the future and what it will be if you do not have the surgery and
look to the future if you do, which is more appealing. Good luck, you have
come this far, it is only a short distance more to the losing side.
— Kim H.
February 25, 2003
YOU ARE NOT ALONE. My surgery is March 7 and now that I have done the Pre
Admission Testing,I am experiencing new fear. I have done the will and
medical directive to the physician (living will) also. I so can relate to
feeling like you are going nuts at various points in the process.
Hang in there and know you are normal. Best wishes to you. Dream big as
you get smaller.
Ann in TX
— Ann B.
February 25, 2003
IT'S NORMAL, the way you are feeling. As time got closer for my
surgery,(I'm 3weeks post op)I would get bouts of what I called
"bugging out". It seemed like I wanted to jump out of my skin.
My main concern wasn't that something would happen to me during surgery so
much as how I was going to handle everything after surgery. The food, what
was I going to eat, how it was all going to unfold. I guess it was the
fear of the unknown and what to do. But if you have had to deal with things
in your life and have successfully gotten through them, which I'm sure you
have, the same strength and commitment that has gotten you through life,
will get you through this.
It takes alot of courage to go through this and you WILL BE OK!
— janice L.
February 25, 2003
OMG...you are SO normal! I have 7 weeks until my surgery and am freaking
out. I've had plenty of surgeries in the past and never had these
feelings. I am not feeling doom & gloom, but anxiousness like you
wouldn't believe. I have been seeing a therapist through all of this and we
just had this discussion last night. Of course, I already knew that it's
partially having to say good-bye to the one thing that (I thought) brought
me comfort all of these years.
I am SOOOO looking forward to walking without pain this summer that it
makes this all worth-while. PLUS you have a GREAT support system behind
you, your soon-to-be hubby. Your are BLESSED.
Stay focused and think of all the benefits that will come with losing the
weight. I can NOT wait to start!
You'll be a little over 3 weeks before me. I'll be praying for you.
— Diane S.
February 25, 2003
Yes, you are normal! I have no children and up until this week I have only
expereinced 'concern'. But now I'm just two weeks away from my surgery and
my fears are becoming more prominent and pervasive. I think it is quite
normal, whether you've had surgery before or not, to feel like you will be
the one person who doesn't . . . . (fill in the blank). A long time ago I
learned that most fear is u>F</u>alse <u>E</u>vidence
<u>A</u>pearring <u>R</u>eal, and this little ditty
has helped me to cope in most instances when my mind begins imagining all
sorts of scary things. Hang in there. Soon we will be on the other side
and will be doing just fine.
— rebalspirit
February 25, 2003
Hi Dayonara,
Yes, I felt the same way you did.....it is normal!! :) I had my surgery on
02/18/03 and did have to be in ICU for one night due to my sleep apnea but
I had the same worries as you. Everything will be just fine and you will
get through it....think positive!! I must tell you being post-op about 1
week, things do change big time!!! You will have to start taking
medications (gallbladder, zantac) and vitamins (B12, iron, calcium) trying
to get these in when you don't even want to drink anything is very hard,
but it is getting easier...and then you have the protein you must get
in...ugh...I didn't think it would be this hard. But the only think I have
in my mind is how I am going to be feeling in a couple of months, so it
gets me through it. Please remember everything will be fine and go in with
a positive attitude....you will be fine and my prayers are with you!!
Debbie - I am 39 yrs old and I do think being younger and doing this is
better too...good luck!
— Debbie V.
February 26, 2003
BOY can relate! My surgery is not scheduled until April and i fear the
Prozac will need tripled by then! Everyone I work with tells me not to have
this surgery as I will probably die! My husband is not so gung ho! I have
1 child from first marraige and the htought of me dieing and him getting
her will make me roll over in my grave!I wish I could just go to sleep and
wake up the day of the surgery! Then I worry about long term complications!
Which is worse living M>O> or taking the risk?
— andrearnc
February 26, 2003
Hey girl, youre' not the only one with that "bag" of feelings...I
had my WLS on Jan. 15, 2003 and Yes, I made out my will and had all my
other paperwork lined up just in case! It is so normal to have all those
feelings and still know that this surgery could actually save your life.
Something that really helped me before my WLS which calmed me was an
affirmation. You don't have to be any particular faith just say
"every hand that touches me on the the day of my surgery is the hand
of God" and know that you will be brought through safely. Best
wishes for you!
— roxanawalker
February 27, 2003
I TOTALLY relate! I had tears streaming down my face even in the operating
room before the anesthesia. I was afraid I would never see my 2 grandbabies
again and they would have to grow up with out my LOVE. the alternative was
that I die of a heart attack or something in a few years from Morbid
obesity.
— **willow**
April 26, 2006
YES. AUTHORIZATION CAME FROM ME ON THE FIRST ATTEMP
I WAS SO HAPPY WHEN I GOT MY LETTER FROM THE INSURANCE, I GAVE MY SURGEON A
CALL TELLING THEM BEFORE THEY KNEW. I WANTED TO TELL EVERY ONE THAT KNOW,S
IM GOING THROUGH , AQUAINTINCES AT WORK , MY FAMILY MY WIFE ME PHYCIATRICE,
EVEN MY DOG HONEY, SHE WAS REAL HAPPY, SHE WANTS TO GO TO THE PARK AND
PLAY!!!!!!!! THIS WAS ABOUT 1 WEEK AGO I HAVE HAD MY XRAYS, BITTEMN BY THE
VAMPIRE AND AM SEEING MY SURGEON 04 MAY 06, I HAD KINDA PUT MY FEELINGS ON
THE BACK SHELF DUE TO MANY MEMBERS IN MY FAMILY I GUESS ARE TO AFRAID FOR
ME TO BE HAPPY AND SUPPORTIVE, AND NOW IM SCHEDULED FOR MY SURGEON IM QUIET
HAPPY THE WAY THINGS ARE GOING, BUT YESTERDAY I STARTED GETTING THESE
WEIRD FEELING'S AND SCARED STIFF, I HAVE ALSO PRODCUED A LIVING WILL AND
IN THE PROCESS OF MY LAST WILL AND TESTEMNT ALSO I'VE BEGUN WRITING LETTERS
TO MY LOVED ONES. I WANT THEM ALL TO KNOW THAT I LOVED THEM AND ARE SORRY I
HURT THEM WITH ALL THIS YOU SEE I BASICALLY HAD TO THOSE AROUND ME THAT
THIER FELLING DID NOT MATTER THAT THE DECISION IM MAKING ARE PARTLY LIFE OR
DEATH, BUT THIERS ONE LETTER I HAVE NOT BEEN ABLE TO WRITE BELIEVE IT OR
NOR ITSW NOT MY WIFE, IT'S MY NIECE MY EMOTIONS TEND TO GET THE BEST OF ME
WHEN I GUST THINK OF HER. SO YOU SEE YOUR NOT ALONE IN THE SCARED ZONE, PS
I'SM NOT NUTS IM REACHING OR ENTERING THE CLINICLY INSANE RELM.
MAY GOD BLESS YOU AND KEEP US ALL SAFE
ROBOTAZZ
— ROBOTAZZ
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