Question:
Happier Then or Now
I know there are a lot of us that are so happy with how our weight loss turned out. Has anyone had the surgery, lost weight, and feel more self-conscious NOW than before weight loss? Is anyone more ashamed of their body or how it looks NOW than before surgery? Does anyone has self-esteem issues more NOW than before surgery? I want to hear your struggle. — poodie (posted on June 5, 2009)
June 5, 2009
We all go thru emotional ups and downs with our weight loss journey. We go
thru a morph and have to rediscover ourselves. We have to get to know who
we are now to ourselves and who we are to the world around us. I have
issues with skin. If I had to choose fat or skin. I take the skin. I am
healthier. I look better in my clothes. I am uncomfortable with men
looking at me and mumbling ooo's and ahhh's. My husband is intimidated a
bit. My sisters that are overweight want the "old" Lesleigh back.
But bottom line. I did this for me. It is the most wonderful gift I could
have done for myself. Plus all my heath issues are corrected, High blood
pressure, high cholesteral, sleep apnea. My self esteem has improved over
all. So I will keep the skin over the fat!
Lesleigh
— lesleigh07
June 5, 2009
I'll keep the skin too, I feel soooo much better!!!! I am healthier and
happier than I've been in years.
— mjbw1947
June 5, 2009
I'm only 14 weeks out and have lost 60 lbs post-op but 100 pre-op, so after
160 lbs so far the saggy skin is really in full swing. I know it will be
another thing to be self-conscious over but I really don't let it bother me
too much. All my jiggles are now badges of courage and accomplishment!
Yeah it's all baggy, but I accomplished emptying that skin. In fact, bring
on more! LOL
— opheliafl
June 6, 2009
When I used the "excesss skin" factor as an excuse not to have
the surgery, I had a good friend say to me - "you have all that skin
now, it is just filled with fat". As mean as some may feel that
comment sounds, it rang soooo true. The skin is frustrating but I look
forward to the day that I can have it somewhat "fixed" with
plastic surgery. The male attention can be unnerving and also have lost
close friends because I am no longer the same person.
The only thing I beat myself up about is the fact that I allowed myself to
get morbidly obese and have a hard time accepting congrats on my loss
(200+lbs)because it is a reminder of how awful it was pre-op. Since I am
15 months out, the topic of conversations with others is not always my wt
loss which is such a relief!
— AuntPamcakes4six
June 6, 2009
i am pre op but i was wondering about the same thing.also i have been big
most of my life so i am concerned on how i will be after i lose alot.i know
i will be the same person but how is everyone else goin to expect me to
act.i guess is what i'm trying to say..like if one day way after surgery
and i have lost a lot of wieght and one day i just happen to be in a great
mood..is everyone going to think i am showing off or will they look at me
then how they look at me now when i'm in a great mood.prob confusing but i
do think like that.will my friends still be my friends?i guess i tried to
answer with a question...sorry.
— carolyn1970
June 6, 2009
Hey Carolyn ,we are best freinds going through this together and we can
handle what anyone thinks or says,
we will take this one day at a time. Theresa
— tmparker
June 8, 2009
I think the biggest thing I run into is people always commenting on how
little I eat. I just want to feel like everyone else. I have gotten use to
it now, I hope it getts better with time.
When ever I see people who havent seen me in awhile they are amazed. So far
no one has quit talking to me but I know it happens. If I join in a
discussion on dieting with large size people that don't know me from before
they think I can't know what they are talking about. I carried a picture of
myself before for awhile to show I really can know what they are talking
about.
I think I am over that now. It feels weird while you figure out your new
place in life.
— trible
June 8, 2009
I think all WLS patients go through a million transitional points. I was
where you are now. I felt like everyone in the universe was giving me
attention. Making eye contact. Talking to me. It was like one day someone
flipped the switch and I was acceptable from the outside - so everyone was
friendly. Normally I would be the outgoing, friendly one - and again, one
day the switch flipped on and wasn't ready for, nor did I foresee this
happening. When it was happening in the beginning I was really off kilter.
I had to deal with it mentally. I just talked things out with my husband
and a few close friends. Got it all out what I was feeling, and how the
attention made me feel, etc. I felt better and now I just take the
compliment, make eye contact back and am friendly as they are to me. What
goes around comes around. If everyone treated everyone else the way they
would like to be treated, the world would be a better place.
— jammerz
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