Question:
How do I wrap my brain arond the posibilty of being "thin"?

I am starting my process for the RNY. People keep asking me if I am scared and the only thing I can think of is being scared of the the unknown-BEING THIN! I have been overweight since I was about 8yrs old. I can't seem to wrap my brain around it. Do I need to see a psych?    — KarenML (posted on October 3, 2009)


October 3, 2009
If your surgeon is anything like most of the others in this country, you'll HAVE to see a psych, at least for an initial workup....to make sure that you don't have any issues that would absolutely sabotage the surgery. I'm 56 years old, and I've been obese since my second child was born, 34 years ago. I've been trying to lose the weight all this time with only varying success, as I'm sure you've probably experienced, also. I began the WLS journey a year ago, weighing 307 pounds, and I'm 5 foot seven and a half inches. I lost about 27 pounds before surgery, then I had my surgery on March 2nd. I'm now down to 190 and only have 20 pounds to go to meet my surgeon's goal. I have experience nothing but euphoria and giddiness, wishing I'd done this a long, long time ago. It's amazing to look in the mirror and see the angles and curves that I haven't seen since I was a teenager. I actually have not only collar bones, but ribs and hipbones, as well!! The only thing I'm not finding all that enjoyable is re-discovering my tailbone. Sometimes it's just not comfortable at all trying to exercise without the padding that WAS in that area of me! <grin> But, truthfully...your psych eval should indicate to you whether or not you need to be seeing a therapist to help you deal with the "idea" of being thin. Lucky for me, I confronted the issues keeping me heavy a few years ago, and with the help of my therapist, was able to heal from them in a remarkable amount of time. Then, it was just a matter of getting the weight off. And that's not necessarily a psycological issue as much as it is a physical issue.... with problems with metabolism and the body having it's own "set-points", etc.
   — Erica Alikchihoo

October 3, 2009
I'm almost 2 yrs out and still wrapping :)
   — lesleigh07

October 4, 2009
In some ways you will never think like a "thin person" After a year at a size 14 (after a size 32) in many ways I still see the same me & think of myself as fat. I know others who have had surgery several years ago & still say the same thing.
   — Donna O.

October 4, 2009
I spoke with Mary Jo Rapini from Big Medicine and she told me it takes about three years to get your brain to process the fact that you are no longer fat/obese. She said with time that will happen.
   — rkurquhart

October 4, 2009
I am 5 and a half years out. Bob was right it took 3 years to wrap my head around being thin. Now I can't remember being that obese. I look back in awe. I still have one pair of fat jeans and a few t shirts I wear to sleep in. I keep them for reminders. I am 5'3 and 125 lbs from a size 22 247 Pds. It is awesome to look for clothes now I can go anywhere (except walmart there clothes are to big, Imagine that!)
   — Kimberly Ten Kate

October 4, 2009
Thank you to all of you for your answers, It has really helped. I look forward to calling on you for more advice.
   — KarenML

October 4, 2009
I think the answer to that question is different for all of us. I am 5 years post-op. I remember feeling excited about my weight loss and found great joy just from feeling healthier. By 18 months to 2 years I started realizing that I felt 20 years younger. I could do the things I used to do, I felt good, and I had plenty of energy. All of those uncomfortable seats and humiliating moments of feeling fat (and unworthy) were a thing of the past. As I reached my goal weight, over the next couple of years, I began to enjoy shopping for clothes. Believe it or not, this last year I actually look at myself in the mirror when I try on new clothes and think, "I look as cute as a bug." I was happy with my body after the first 2 years, simply because of the return to good health I enjoyed. The rest of my weight loss has been "gravy". For me, the weight loss is just a way to ensure that my health never gets that bad again! I wish you the best as you begin your journey toward better health. God Bless.
   — KimM

October 4, 2009
I don't have an answer for you..but rather a tid bit...I am almost 16 months post op and I went from a size 24 and weight of 237 to a size 4 and weight of 118 and I still turn sideways to get thru a "tight" spot. It will take time to adjust , but thank God we all took the initiative to do this and get healthy! Best of luck to you! Hugs , Kim
   — gpcmist

October 5, 2009
being thin is a hard concept when you have not been there. I have been there for several months now and still have trouble seeing myself this way. It is a big image adjustment and you should not feel bashful about asking for professional help to adjust to the new life. Start now and begin to work on your self image.
   — trible

October 5, 2009
I read you question and laughed to myself. I am going on three years (RNY) on Feb. 15, 2010. Although I have come to terms with being "thin" it's still not something I have overcome. Yes. I started out before surgery wearing a size 26/28 bottom. Now I wear a size 4 /6 or an 8/10 depending on the clothing manufacturer. I used to wear a size 18/20 top. Now... I wear a small or medium depending on the cut and manufacturer. When I go shopping, of course I do not reach for the plus sizes, but I do often pick up a size 12 or 10 by habit and then have to remind myself that it will be too big for me. I have been graced with the smaller body and have been blessed with the ability to keep the weight off for almost 3 years - do I still feel fat? somedays I do. I was fat for 35 years. it doesn't just "go away" over night. Have I come along way since surgery? You bet'cha. As with working on my weight for the rest of my life, portion control, living within my boundries, taking my supplements, etc. I will also be working on the mental side of things. I am sure people out there can turn the light switch off with ease - but I think for the most of us - we will continually have to work on the physical and mental aspects of our weight control and management for the rest of our lives. It's OK by me. Would I rather be "thin" and have to think about food, exercise and what I put in my body vs. being "fat" trying to do the same. I will take the thin side every time. If you do struggle with your thin/fat issues once you start losing and loving life again, sure see a therapist. Talk to your PCP and see who you have to see. There is no shame (at all) in seeking help to keep you healthy, sane and happy. Good luck. See you on the loser's bench. Batter' up.
   — jammerz

October 5, 2009
I'm glad someone posted this question. I am 2 months RNY post op and have lost 68lbs. I've went from a 34/36 to a 26/28 and I know I have a long way to go, but sometimes I look in the mirror and I wonder if I'll continue losing. Is it really possible for me to be THIN?! I've been overweight my entire life! I passed my psychiatrist exam, but those thoughts still sit in the back of my mind. RNY is not a cure, it's a tool and that scares me.
   — C. Barnes




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