I finally received my surgery date....

May 29, 2011

5/29/11

I researched & contemplated this decision for a year before I even began the procedures this 2 year journey is now finally culminating to what I am trying to think of as a new beginning & not an end. 

After a year of seeing every Doctor you can possibly think of I've finally gotten my surgery date, June 14, 2011.

Now that I've had a chance to finally see the light at the end of the tunnel.....well....frankly....I'm scared shitless.  I'm an intelligent person & understand completely how this all works but of course part of me, the part that's been on every diet known to man for the past 25 years is like.....what if i fail, again.  What if I can't do this?  What if I don't have the willpower?  Then I stop myself because negativity doesn't help anything & frankly just makes me wanna eat...lol.

I've used food as a comfort my entire life, its always been there for me, I'm afraid to give it up (spoken like a true addict). 

In 3 weeks my entire life is going to change.....& part of me can't freakin wait....& the other part of me is dreading it like doomsday......I need to focus more on the good things & try not to focus on the negitive which always causes me to turn to food for comfort. 

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