Refocus

Jul 05, 2010

I've eaten my face off over the last two days.  Well I've eaten as much as a toddler sized stomach can hold.  I haven't followed any plan other than the "see food" plan and I'm not proud of myself because of it.  Eventhough the amount of food I can consume is negligable in the grand scheme of things, I still can't let this get out of control because I've been there and done that and have the fat clothes to prove it.  Not only do I have the fat clothes (yes, I still have some--don't judge me), I also have memories of the aching joints and lower back to go along with them. 

Starting tomorrow I'll be doing my sugar/carb detox plan in which I go back to Phase 1 of the post-op diet where I only consume high protein liquids.  I want to be able to do this for a full week but I take progress day by day.  Last time I lasted three days and felt pretty good until I found myself in a social situation where the focal point was food.  It's hard going back to food after several days on liquids.  Not only that, I feel much better when I consume liquids only.

I know this sounds dreadful but I don't consider it a punishment at all.  Sometimes I have to start over so I can stay focused on my end results which are good health and less body mass.  I'm still having touble adjusting to my new frame but that's a post for a different day.

It's likely I'll combine this period with some type of exercise regime--a combo of Bikram Yoga, cardio and resistance training.  The discipline of Bikram Yoga helps me stay focused, enforcing the "mind tells the body what to do" principles.  For much of my life I've been living in the reverse allowing the flesh to tell me what to do instead of the spirit.  I also feel a period of intense prayer coming as well since I need to detox my spirit as well. I actually pray during yoga. (aside: optimum health requires a three prong approach: mind, body & spirit, but again, that's a post for another day)  My pastor's webiste has sermons I can listen to and I can always call him for guidance when if necessary. I should attend Sunday service but it's not my preference.  If I could get a closed service (read: minstered to on a one on one basis) I'd be more inclined to attend. Until I re-enroll in yoga, I'll start with cardio and resistance training and rotate them.

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